The Big Lebowski 2011--- By, Colin Linneweber posted by Colin Linneweber

The Big Lebowski 2011 

By, 

Colin Linneweber 

Walter locks Sobchak Security’s front door and walks to his van at approximately 9PM on Sunday, May 1. He turns on the radio and learns Usama Bin Laden has reportedly been killed by U.S. forces in Pakistan.  

“What happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass,” mutters Walter while shaking his head with a satisfied smirk.  

Walter calls The Dude on his cell phone to inform him of the breaking news. The Dude expresses little interest as he tells Walter he is smoking a joint and enjoying a relaxing bath. Similarly, Walter pays no attention to The Dude’s reefer-induced briefing. He is entirely concentrating on details of the successful assassination of the world’s most wanted terrorist. 

“The beauty of this is its simplicity. If the plan gets too complex something always goes wrong. If there’s one thing I learned in Nam--”  

The Dude interrupts Walter and surprisingly opinionates Bin Laden’s death could trigger more terrorist acts. 

“You have got to buck up, man” Walter loudly and angrily demands. “Really, Dude, you surprise me. They’re not gonna kill shit, they’re not gonna do shit. What can they do? They’re a bunch of fuckin’ amateurs. A bunch of fig-eaters wearing towels on their heads, trying to find reverse in a Soviet tank.” 

Walter pulls out of the parking lot and drives northbound towards Venice. The Dude questions if killing Bin Laden in cold-blood was the right choice. He wonders if the terror kingpin should have instead been brought to justice. 

How Much Style is Too Much For League Bowling? posted by Michael Rollberg

When is the line crossed from acceptable style to over doing it? The obvious no-nos are jewelry and other accessories that may cause injury. But what about a men's league? The bar is lowered and raised by certain individuals. Some wear sweatpants and "give up." That becomes a case of too little fashion for league bowling and offers a topic for another day. Others go with their custom faded jeans, and black and gray designer t-shirts, ready to boogie the night away after bowling. But when the custom fading becomes a brighter than ever could have been achieved by washing efect, you have overshot your fashion target.That's where I say, "Please turn your pants off!" Continue reading "How Much Style is Too Much For League Bowling?"

Big Daddy Appreciates Roster Depth posted by Les Leonard

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     Saints reserves flexed their muscles down the stretch Friday night, obvious bench-strength improvements on defense and running back certainly complement the NFL’s most prolific offense looking toward the upcoming 2010 campaign. Leigh Torrence’s and Chris Ivory’s fourth quarter fireworks shattered the Chargers’ dreams of a happy Big Easy ending. That won’t be the case for the thousands of black leather clad visitors (accented by purple and powder blue feathers) prancing through the Vieux Carre this Labor Day weekend. Enterprising Marigny and Bywater lads who took advantage shake-weight TV offers will see the Fruits of Labor come to fruition during the annual Southern Decadence extravaganza. In this week’s edition the Section 645 Saints Beat, Big Daddy celebrates Ben Sherman’s 40th Birthday, second lines at Parasol’s, reports from Section 645, recaps the San Diego game, remembers Hurricane Katrina, and releases his World Famous Pregame Information.

     Renowned Kingpin owner and $ Thousand Car bassist icon, Steve Watson organized a surprise 40th Birthday Bash for Ben Sherman (his Kingpin partner-in-crime) on Saturday. Ben’s chest grab and the shocked look on his face when he entered the Martinque Bistro reminded Big Daddy of Fred Sanford proclaiming: “Elizabeth I’m coming to join you honey!” The Kingpin all-star lineup began a memorable day with a special “Sherm” Martinque lunch menu. Legendary chefs Eric LaBouchere and Nat Carrier redefined the term “fine dining experience.” The food was so awesome, it would have had Emeril Lagasse wondering how to duplicate such perfection. Thank you so much guys. Unfortunately, Mother Nature washed out our Lakewood golf outing, and there was no availability at any area bowling alleys— so did what we do best, bar hopped across Uptown (courtesy of our wonderful chauffeur, Tamme), finally settling in at Parasol’s to waste away the afternoon. The Kingpin became the medicated delegation’s last destination, where Ben delivered a endearing speech thanking his Mom, Steve, the Kingpin staff, and all of his friends for helping him turn 40 like a champion.

Legend Of The Goon Squad pt.2 posted by Goon Squad

Violence has been a part of hockey since at least the early 1900's. According to the book Hockey: A People's History, in 1904 alone, four players were killed during hockey games from the frequent brawls and violent stickwork. 

Early hockey in particular was noted for its extreme violence, to the point where two players were killed in three years during brawls.
In both cases, the accused assailants were acquitted, but these and other bloody incidents led to calls for the sport to clean up its act or be banned with the likes of cock fighting.

The worst of the violence waned, particularly with regulations for quasi-legal fisticuffs, though incidents continue to occur from time to time.

Billy Coutu was the first player banned from the NHL for life when, in 1927, he attacked referee Jerry Laflamme in a Stanley Cup game between the Bruins and Senators - in which several players complained about the officiating, supposedly at the request of Bruins coach Art Ross before starting an all-in brawl.
NHL president Frank Calder, the League's first president, expelled Coutu from the NHL for life on March 29th, 1929; the ban was lifted after five years, but Coutu never played again in the NHL.
Billy Coutu - an OG Supreme! (Original Goon)

Other incidents include the December 12th, 1933 event when Eddie Shore hit Leafs player Ace Bailey from behind.
Bailey never played hockey again.
Another OG.

Somewhat recently, controversy and criminal charges have resulted from violent attacks by Marty McSorley, Todd Bertuzzi, and Chris Simon.

Funny non-sport related videos!!!!! posted by Devin

I know these 3 clips have nothing to do with sports, but I thought that it would be entertaining because all you need to do is laugh sometimes.  I will probably post 3 videos every so often so stay tuned, I guess:

THEY GET BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IT GETS EVEN BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!

STAY TUNED, THERE ARE MORE LAUGHS TO COME!!!!!!!!!

Devin

Welcome to BowlingFanSite.com posted by Sports Fan

Welcome bowling fans!

Please join the site if you love bowling.  I've set this site up so that bowlers can interact with other bowlers, share bowling tips and strategy, and find bowling leagues to participate in.  Joining is free and easy so sign up now.

The Third Season posted by Zach Koenig

Being a fan of the NFL, by all accounts right now I should be doing nothing but preparing for the "holiest" of all days...Super Bowl Sunday.  Now don't get me wrong, I will watch the game on Sunday and enjoy it, but I really don't get into all the hype that precedes it.  In fact, I really dislike the fact that two weeks must commence between the AFC/NFC Championships and the overall title game (although I DO like the fact that it gives the players a chance to rest up in order to give their best performances).  However, at about this time every year, I start to become hooked by another sport...bowling.  I'm usually just a baseball (Twins) and football (Vikings) guy (I haven't watched an entire basketball or hockey game in years), so that February-March void needs to be filled with something (and Spring Training doesn't quite cut it).  Thus, I turn my attention to bowling.  Whether it be lacing up the flattened shoes at the actual alley or watching the pros break a sweat over every ball, I love what the sport of bowling represents: the idea that a task (knock down ten pins) that looks so easy can be so frustrating.

A few years ago, while attending college at the University of Minnesota-Morris and writing sports columns for their University Register newspaper, I penned an article dealing with why I find the whole bowling experience to be so interesting.  I would like to share that article here on this blog.  Sure, it's not exactly football related, but since when does my head look like Stewie Griffin's (if you watch Family Guy you'll get it!).  Here's the article:

Water'd Down Bye Weeks..... posted by Bernie

…..are like pitchers of beer at the St. Simons bowling alley. 

 Eight days until the Dawgs take on Georgia Tech.

All's quiet in Butts-Mehre this weekend. The players are huddling with family and friends for a change and the coaches are surely huddling with future players they hope will choose to wear silver britches. The only sound coming from the building is a dryer full of wet laundry someone left running. Let's see if we can sort through it.
  

Let's start with some recruitin'. As other schools in the southeast dabble in coaching changes some recruits who had previously committed are beginning to stretch their neck back out. It has been reported this week that J.K. Jay of Greenville, SC is willing to look at UGA in case Clemson doesn't retain their current staff. Coach Richt and Coach Searels jumped at the opportunity and will be entertaining the young behemoth this weekend. If Jay were to switch commits (and it looks like we are the only other school he may look at as he has spurned opportunities to visit floriduh and Bama) it would add to what is shaping up to be a stellar O Line class. Jay would join Chris Burnette (no relation), Austin Long and Dallas Lee as UGA commits and we have our interest in a couple others who are also on ESPN's 150 Watch List. 

Speaking of Clemson, there are rumors that the head job is Dabo's to lose. Swinney took over when Tommy Bowden played some Steve Miller Band and took the money and run. There is evidently a lot of support from the athletic director for Dabo, but to hire him would be putting the ADs neck on the line. If Terry Don Phillips doesn't get his way, then Bobby Johnson will be given a chance to turn the job down. I don't know much about Dabo, but I do know that the Tigers need a coach that forces his players to get tough. They laid down in the Georgia Dome after the first two snaps. Bobby Johnson would not allow that.

BYU’s Task: Save the Utes From Themselves posted by Michael Pickett

Everyone knows that little kids are dumb.  They will pull a pot of boiling water down on themselves, or put small objects in their mouths, or grab sharp objects by the wrong end.  Parents in the animal kingdom may have to expend all of their energy protecting their young from outside predators, but human parents know that most of the time, the biggest danger to a child is himself.  Protecting a baby from himself is a tiring job for sure, but if the baby survives to adulthood with minimal injuries, it can be quite rewarding.

     This week, the Cougars have a task similar to that of a parent.  If the Utes have their way this week, they will win the game against BYU, end the season undefeated, and go to a BCS game.  Whether they win their bowl game is beyond my concern, because BYU has to make sure that all of this doesn’t happen.  For Utah’s own sake.  Yes, if they win, the Utes will get their moment in the spotlight, but like a baby, they are not looking at the big picture, the long term repercussions of what we do in the present.

     The Mountain West is a strong conference this year.  Only the SEC and the Big 12 have more ranked teams than the MWC.  The Big 10 and the Pac 10 have three ranked teams along with the MWC and their average rankings is telling.  The Big 10’s average ranking is 11, the MWC’s is 13 and the Pac 10’s is 17.  It’s also worth noting that the Pac 10’s highest ranked team, USC, may not even win the conference because they lost to Oregon State, ranked 21, a team which Utah beat.  The two other BCS conferences, the Big East and the ACC, are hardly even worth mentioning with these other conferences.  They have two ranked teams each and all of them are ranked lower than the lowest ranked team in the MWC, TCU at 18.

Cowboy Nation posted by David Salinas

Giants win.  It's not like we didn't see this coming.  It's not like we expected Brad Johnson to be this 40-year-old superman overnight.  Anyone with half a brain (I mean you Shesawn) could see that Dallas limped into Giant stadium, just about half the team they were when they started the season.  Yet the Giants celebrated like they won the Super Bowl in November.  That just speaks volumes. 

This is not a shock to Cowboys fans.  There was a glimmer of hope, but after that first offensive series by the Giants, we all knew it would be a miracle to keep up.  It was clear that Brad Johnson forgot to take his Metamucil and decided to help New York by turning it over twice, and allowing some sacks.  That guy has got to go.  He proves that experience counts for nothing once you pass a certain age, right John McCain?  40 is the new 80 by football standards.  Or maybe Brad just looks like the mummy unwrapped standing next to Brooks Bollinger.  Is that kid 18 or what?  Brooks didn't start off on the right foot, but he clearly was better.  He looks like a back up.  Brad Johnson looks like my grandfather in a football costume.  Hey Brad, Halloween is over, take off that uniform.  (That's not all together fair, Brad is only a few years older than me.)  His time has come, I don't expect to see Johnson next year on any team.

Speaking of punk a** quarterbacks, what gives with Troy Aikman?  Every time he does a Cowboy game, it's as if he's a life long fan other team!  I've heard of a non-biased color commentator, but what Troy does is border line Bennedict Arnold, and without color.  That's right, i said it:  Troy Aikman is a traitor.  He sat back with a smile and gleefully praised New York.  He said that even with Tony Romo, Dallas probably didn't have a chance.  He may be right, but that doesn't make it ok.  Tony may have added three touchdowns, still not enough, but it would have been more respectable.  Shame on you Troy, you insult the Star you once wore.  I don't excuse you're back stabbing simply because you won three Super Bowls in the 90's.  What have you done for us lately?  You laughed at our team on Sunday.  I was stunned, without question.  Take a page from Emmitt Smith.  He constantly battles Steve Young (these guys hate each other) and defends the Cowboys without fail.  And he doesn't care if he's right.  He refuses to let that punk, Steve Young say anthing negative about the Dallas.  That is a true Cowboy, without question.  Without Question Troy!  Come up with a better response than "Without Question" Aikman, you sound like a damn moron.  I mean, the other midget asks you something, i already know what the first words out of your mouth are.  Weak Snaikman, weak.
Continue reading "Cowboy Nation"